Le Français!

I've been speaking french rather obsessively since I got home several hours ago, so to get it out of my system, I'm going to share my favorite french phrases!!
"C'est d'enfer!" -- lit. It's from hell! It actually can mean either "it's awesome" or "it's awful"

"Bédéphile" -- means someone who loves comics, but it sounds almost exactly like pédéphile, so be damned careful to stress that 'b'!

"Vachement" -- lit. cow-ly, but it means 'very', 'bloody', 'really', or 'damned'.

"Je suis chocolat!" -- I've been tricked, fooled.

"Tais-toi!" -- This is the rudest way you can possibly tell someone to be quiet.

"Le pinard, le picrate, le jaja, la bibine" -- all of these mean 'bad wine'. Getting a sense of french values?

One of the coolest things about modern french slang is Verlan. Verlan is a sort of slang where they invert syllables, basically saying everything backwards. In fact, Verlan IS verlan:

l'envers (reverse) ... l'en vers... vers l'en... versl'en... verslen... verlen... verlan

Par exemple:

Verlan: un keuf | zyva! | barjot | chelou | la siquemu | céfran
Français: un flic | vas-y! | jobard | louche | la musique | français
English: a cop | Go! | crazy | sketchy | music | french

...merde...

Perhaps it was arrogant, but yes: I thought I was getting the hang of french. That illusion has been cruelly torn from my grasping fingers. Yes, I have been thoroughly disabused of the foolish notion. "But how?", you ask, and I fear not, for I shall tell you.

I've begun my summer reading for French. 'Pierre et Jean' by Guy de Maupassant didn't seem too difficult based on the description of it-- simple storyline etc. I've had a rude awakening. I've been blown out of the water, the preceding pun being entirely intentional, by the nautical terminology. In the first 3 pages alone I've encountered these terms:

Tribord-- starboard (Nobody can keep these two straight anyway... hmph)
Bâbord-- port
tolet-- oarlock (I'm not rightly sure what that is in English...)
aviron-- oar
matelot-- sailor/seaman
nageoires-- fins
d'écailles-- scales (O.K. this one's a cognate... but still!)
mordre-- to bite/gnaw
mordiller-- to nibble
une barque-- a boat (Isn't one word for boat enough?! Just use 'un bateau'!)

I HAVE 200 PAGES OF THIS TO LOOK FORWARD TO!!!!!!
...well... it probably won't all be nautical know-how... they're just on a fishing trip...but-- all the same, man!!


On the bright side I've learned two (count 'em two!) fantastic french words!

morbleu!-- zounds!

un gredin-- a scoundrel

How brilliant would it be if words like those were reintegrated into modern English?! I'm certainly going to do my part to bring them back!